Lonelily
by Delle Tuh
Summary: Could have knocked off the evening but you lonelily let him push under your bone. You let me down. It's no use deceiving - neither of us wanna be alone. A Lily and James oneshot. Rated for some Language and Themes.


**Author's Note: **I was in the middle of writing this essay for a scholarship (nasty business, I tell you) when I came across a really good song by my favorite acoustic man Damien Rice. I read the lyrics and Rafael totally got this story stuck in my head. I couldn't help but write it down, however cliche it might be from what I normally write, I like it. It has an unexpected ending, I think, especially for our lovely James. Though, ye be warned, it is kinda sad.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own _Harry Potter._

**Lonelily**

"_There's no use deceiving; Neither of us wanna be alone."_

She looked so beautiful in the moonlight, soft and fragile, everything he wanted her to be.

_His._

No spiteful words bit at her lips and scratched his sensitive ears and the only screams that could be found were not the hurtful obscenities that he was used to hearing strung around his name, they were desperate and needy. And for a moment he pretended it was him she needed.

And for a moment, he believed it.

--

Emptiness was what he found when he knocked on the Head Girl's dormitory, nothing but the lonely rush of wind between sheets and curtains he'd seen drawn and mussed earlier.

He hadn't expected her to be there on that particular night, with N.E.W.T's looming so menacingly in the near future, the guilt of not being in the library studying scolding him almost as much as Remus would when he dropped into bed early that morning.

So he walked the corridors with slow, dawdling steps, his thoughts filled with memories that reeled like movies in his head, all black and white and dramatic. Lips opened in moans that sounded too hollow in his thoughts, the real thing far too beautiful to replicate even in his forlorn state.

The vast sea of stairs creaked like a storm as he approached, his feet pattering softly like rain against the forgotten stone steps, and in the midst of the hurricane's symphony, something tugged at his raw ears, familiar enough to make his mouth water and his eyes do the same with the realization that it wasn't he who was causing the noises to erupt from such a beautiful mouth.

He crept like the eye of the storm to the Second Floor Corridor, the sound becoming an echoing cacophony that seemed to seep into his heart and shatter it into a million pieces that cut his insides like shards of glass.

James could practically taste the blood on his tongue.

But as the slow creaking of the heavy wooden door penetrated the broken moans and whimpers, all he caught was that familiar flash of scarlet, and with it, the shadowy cast of ebony locks tangled between delicate, pale fingers.

And he couldn't help but run.

--

His movements were sure, his face almost arrogantly pointed toward the moon, his sharp features creating garish shadows that stretched strangely around his face, but his eyes held certainty. And he continued to saunter down the corridor in search of another lonely Prefect girl out doing her nightly duties, and, having been a former Prefect himself, he knew boredom was going to be evident in every step she had walked that night.

So when the Ravenclaw girl he'd seen talking to Fabian earlier that day in Herbology stalked from behind a corner, wand lit and raised in front of her soft and dark features, it felt like fate. Like a cruel and hideously beautiful woman of Fate dangling forbidden pleasures before him, taunting and mocking his revenge yearning pain.

But he knew it wouldn't take much to lure her into a dark alcove somewhere close by, knew by her deliciously round curves and they way they rocked innocently back and forth with every small step she took that no one had ever attempted what he was about to do before.

And she would have gladly followed him into the Forbidden Forest and back.

Sirius would have been proud, Remus would have scolded him once again and Peter would have praised his successes, but truth-be-told it almost hurt using the beautiful (but still not beautiful enough) girl's vulnerability. And when she giggled from the excitement he could feel crawling from her skin, he almost wanted to tell her to leave, that he was no good, no good for anyone.

But, like always, his selfishness won over, and he pulled her into the darkness.

Her breath was sweet and smoky, like the embers of a fire as her lips pressed against his, all parted flesh and dampened skin. But even as they curved around his, his dick screaming between his legs, his heart was louder, much louder, just as loud as the loneliness that had taken him there.

And he couldn't bring himself to kiss her back.

Her warm brown eyes opened, doe like and gleaming rejection back at him, causing his stomach to curl inward and lurch into his throat, making him choke back on the words he knew he needed to say. But nothing charming was sitting on the tip of his tongue, there was no wit in the corners of his smirking lips and he couldn't bring himself to brush the awkward moment away.

Instead, he drew her closer and pressed his red cold ear against her chest, right next to her heart.

He closed his eyes when she relaxed against him, her hands finding his wild tufts of hair, fingertips tracing cowlicks and making his head swim happily, with her rhythmically calming heartbeat slowly sending him off to sleep.

--

**After Thought:** You can put whomever in the room with Lily, though I did specifically make it so you though it was Snape. And just because I'm not normally this vulgar, I used that particular part to express his hormones, not necessarily his dick. Haha. Just clarifying some things. Review, please! -Delta


End file.
